Halo Combat Evolution (2001)

Game Review

Halo Combat Evolution (2001) 6/10

So everyone keeps going on about how halo changed FPS gaming well so I finally decided to check it out and see what all the fuss is about, and I must say, I am not impressed. Fine it looks solid and plays solid yet it feels like I’m playing Half Life with a green suit (although you can change it to orange if so inclined) and the ability to drive a beach buggy. But then again this was an Xbox thing and I’m playing it on PC.

The story seams basic so far, aliens bad humans good, we kill aliens. The game runs on a 3 weapon system meaning you can only hold 3 weapons at any time 2 guns and grenades (4 of a kind), and switching between them is fast and easy. So far the game is very mediocre and I cannot see myself giving it more than a rating of 6, but that said ill still continue playing it to see where it goes.

The Crow City of Angels (1996)

Movie review

The Crow City of Angels (1996)   5/10

Plot

Some years after the first Crow Movie another man is resurrected by the crow after he and his son are murdered for witnessing a gang killing. the movie plays of in Los Angeles, the city of angels is plagued by drugs and violence The new crow is a man named Ashe Corven (Vincent Pérez) and is assisted by a grown-up version of Sarah (Mia Kirshner) from the first movie who’s role could have been replaced by a fridge, as she does nothing but provide a girl to look at. So Ashe goes out to kill drug king Judah Earl (Richard Brooks) and his thugs Spider-Monkey, Nemo, Kali and Curve (Iggy Pop).

Visual

The movie looks good, dirty and gritty in nice sepia tones, the special effects are lame but don’t destroy the film. The costume design is very confusing, for instance The Crow wears black biker boots, black leather pants, a heavy black leather trench coat, everything looking good and then they top it off with a black vest??? And no not one that fits but a vest that exposes the crow’s stomach so that he looks like a spice girl. His hair is shoulder length and frizzy so it looks like a half afro and the makeup is wrong as they gave him black lip liner with red lips, all in all the crow looks nice in a far off shot but close up he looks like a transvestite. All the villains look good except main baddy Judah who looks like he walked of an Egyptian set for some scones. The city of angels kinda looks like the set from Escape from L.A, all messed up, broken cars and stuff everywhere, with people wearing day of the dead masks and kids in Halloween gear (cut straight out of movie one) but it all still looks good.

My opinion

Firstly I am a Huge Crow Fan so I really want to give this movie a good review, unfortunately it’s just not that good of a movie, it’s not horrible but that’s definitely not the point. There are some really nice scenes in this movie, especially when Ashe stars kicking ass as the crow, laughing at the others discomfort and going crazy unfortunately moments like these always go with one-liners and every time he opens his mouth he sound like the terminator with his thick accent. The plot is lame and pretty much a copy from the first movie, there could have been a nice romance twist but that was cut short by Sarah lack of personality and inability to do more than stare into open spaces and Ashe’s constant crying. Iggy Pop is probably the most entertaining thing in this movie as he plays his character really good and look good as well. There is no Heart in this movie as you never feel a connection with the main character because he just has no personality

Bottom-line

Only watch if you are a fan of The Crow.

I give this movie 5 out of 10 average feathers, and that’s only because I’m a fan.

13th Warrior (1999)

Movie review
13th Warrior (1999) 8/10


Plot 
Set somewhere in 922 AD a Muslim poet and wife fondler (Antonio Banderas) is banished from his home land by some nobly offended husband. He is send somewhere? And on the way is saved from Mongol Tatar raiders by the appearance of a Vikings ship sailing on a river in the desert, anyway so there he meets the rest of the cast a bunch of rowdy Viking warriors and there newly appointed king. On his second day in camp a messenger appears (other Viking king’s son, who subsequently never again makes a appearance in the movie?) bringing news of “those that will not be named” attacking there village and they need assistance, so true to Viking valor (and stupidity) only 12 warriors set out and a Muslim poet while there rest of the horde chill on the banks of the desert river camp. Anyway the extremely smart and perceptive Ahmad Ibn Fadlan (Banderas) soon learns the Viking language by listening, even though the 12 Vikings are speaking different languages, but never the les who am I to judge, after that is sorted the party is off and the adventure starts.

Visual
Nice to look at, good selection of scenery although the Viking/desert thing still confuses me, especially since Ibn (Banderas) apparently comes from Baghdad and Vikings from Scandinavia (Denmark, Norway, and Sweden) which is very far apart, but not impossible. Costume design is nicely done although very wrongly as our Viking party’s armor ranges from Knights chain mail (500 AD), Roman gladiator armor (264 BCE) and even a Spanish Conquistadors armor (1492 AD) makes a appearance. Well traveled Vikings I must say, they even managed to travel to the future. Apart from that the movie is a warrior action movie and mainly consists of fighting warriors, the fight scenes look nice and there is a fair amount of blood, guts and amputated body parts, all backed with a epic soundtrack.

My opinion 
Loved it. Although there where confusing aspects and unfinished and underdeveloped plot lines (2, one romance and one concerning a arrogant prince ling) it all made for a epic watch as our Viking warriors strived to best a unknown foe and learn an well mannered Arab the ways of the blood encrusted sword. The movie is based on the book Eaters of the dead which in turn is loosely based on the Anglo-Saxon epic poem Beowulf. Bottom-line, it is a straight forward hack and slash Fantasy/Action with no pretty icing toppings.

I give this Movie an epic 8 Bloody Battle axes out of 10.